6.6.08

family blog is up and running

For the sake of ease, we've combined all our blogs into one family blog, and will be catching up with all our friends over there from now on. So change your Bloglines links, and make sure to comment!

2.6.08

fat squirrels and other observations

Old things are new again. After living in India for 3 years, random things shock us about the US:

  • Luggage carts in the airport are $3! A piece!! They were free in India. But I guess if you count the man following you and asking for a tip, then they weren't really free in India, either.
  • American squirrels are fat! Well...compared to Indian chipmunks, anyway. They're probably just normal sized, but to our eyes, it seems we went away for 3 years and came back to obese squirrels.
  • Driving fast is still weird for me. Before last week, I hadn't driven at all in 3 years. Sometime around January, no kidding, I started having nightmares about driving again. I haven't driven on I-45 yet because I'm still scared, but I have gotten up to 50 mph, which is progress.
  • It's fun to walk in the neighborhood and not be on alert for cars, bikes, carts, rickshaws, etc, that will not stop or even slow down for you.
  • People make small talk! I never thought Indians were rude (except when the aunties wouldn't smile at me after I smiled at them...that would bother me) and I never noticed that they don't make small talk. Maybe I just never expected it because we don't share the same first language. But here, everyone makes small talk, which is something we noticed immediately upon arriving in the Newark airport.
  • The sky is blue again! I never thought Delhi was a dirty city (and still don't) but the grass was definitely not as green, nor was the sky as blue. So even though people don't seem to wear as bright of colors or paint their homes in fun shades, at least we get to see a more vivid color in nature.
  • It takes no time at all to run errands. On Friday, James and I dropped Hazel off with Nana, bought cell phones, signed up for service (at an AT&T shop that was 40 minutes away), went clothes shopping, and returned home. I was shocked to see that it was barely noon.
There are plenty other observations, but it's time for Hazel and me to go run all over town for errands and be done probably faster than it takes to mail a letter in Delhi.

15.5.08

the great flat search of 2005

My friend Shelah did a fun blog about some doozy homes they looked at recently while house searching. I laughed a lot at it because it also brought back some scary memories of when we were apartment searching here in South Asia. I couldn't find the pictures from our Capital search, but I still had some pics from when we were searching in the Himalayas.

This was th
e first flat we saw. We loved it! Except...the location. It was literally a walk down three steep hills to get there! We even went back to look at it again just in case the walk there wasn't as bad as we remembered...but it was. We even liked the pink walls. haha You gotta take what you can get here. And the bathrooms were fun. I have a theory with the bathrooms here - they are almost always odd colors with a lot of printed tiles. I think the bathroom is their room to experiment with decorating. Our current home has camels in one bathroom...I love it! Who else can shower and see camels trotting by?

Ano
ther place we looked at had a huge mold/mildew problem on the walls. Pretty much every wall had some mildew on it. We expressed our concern about this, and received the typical South Asian reply: "Take no tension, we will paint over it."

Also, here's another fun bathroom picture. As you can see from the picture, this place was super nice. Unfortunately it was way too expensive. And it was so loaded down with furniture we could barely move through the apartment, but they wouldn't take any pieces out! We saw a total of 8 available flats, and were told these were all they had. Fortunately, one a bit more suitable miraculously became before we had to move into one of these.

Check out some of the fun kitchens we saw:
Where does this kitchen window lead to? It's a mystery.

Check out these half Western half squatty potties! If you are used to sitting, you can sit on the lid, but if you are more inclined to squat, you can
stand on the ridged foot part! (The second one was actually in the home we lived in :)

Most of the places
we looked at, even if they were already vacant, had a spot for po0ja (or id0l w0rship).

One thing most of the flats did have was a pretty awesome view!

13.5.08

random photos

I have some random pictures that I don't think I've ever posted before, with a few random facts thrown in.

This is a child's school bus! A lot of times you'll see a cart go by with children locked in a cage, on their way to school. Doesn't sound quite safe to me. I like it that this one is called "Jingle Bell."

You see people carry the most random things on their scooters, bikes, rickshaws, you name it. Last night I commented to some friends that I have a funny picture of a man carrying a computer on a scooter. At least 2 others piped in, "I have a picture like that too!" Here's mine...I was wrong though, he's on a cycle rickshaw.

The largest m0sque in the country is in our city, and we visited it last year. Here is a picture from it. The construction was completed in 1626, and can hold 10s of thousands of men at the appointed times.

Most auto rickshaw's will have stickers on their windshields. Sometimes you'll see Bollywood stars, sometimes pictures of their favorite g0d(s). This one sadly lumped in ours with it - he's trying to cover all the bases.

Every now and then, you'll see trees with marigolds and pictures of g0ds up against them. I'm not sure why these particular trees get w0rshipped, but they do. This one is on our street.

And lastly, as many of you know, this culture is very modest. No kissing in movies, and definitely no kissing in public. So many times, young people will sneak off to gardens alone together. Yesterday, Andrea took our family to these cool old ruins to take some family pictures. (she ROCKS!) Anyway so we caught these two there together (and it was before 10am!!). I guess they also go to the old ruins to make out? I guess if you're gonna disobey the parents, you should do it in style? :)

8.5.08

what i'll miss

I have grown to love many things about this culture that I'm living in, and I am really going to miss a lot of it when we leave in just a couple weeks. Obviously, the relationships we have made I will miss the most, and not only with the nationals we've met. When you pick up and move to the other side of the world, you form an incredible bond with other like-minded people who have also left their 'home' country as well. You become family. So now our hearts are divided in that are hard to explain, but certainly easy to feel.

Like I said, I'm going to miss so much, so I thought a top 10 was in order. Like the one I did about what I'm looking forward to, I'm not putting the obvious one of family and friends. That's already a given!

Top 10 Things I'll Miss the Most About South Asia:


10. The mangoes! Oh you wouldn't believe how good the mangoes are here in season. And not just the fresh ones (which are incredible), but you can a
lso always find mango juice, mango popsicles, mango ice cream...I don't even know if you can get such fresh mangoes in the US. I sure hope so!

9. Cheap Indian Food! I know in the US you can get Indian food, and it can even be good quality and authentic. However, I've heard it's usually super expensive. The Indian restaurant here I will miss the most has a dish called Veg Thali - it comes with enough food to feed you for at least two meals, if not 3, it's oh so delicious, and it's only $2.50. Oh, and they deliver. Naturally.
Which takes me to the next one...

8. Deliveries! I've posted about it before - I love how everyone delivers here. I'm going to really miss that!

7. Creativity and contentment! I'll admit, sometimes it's a pain, but because lots of conveniences aren't available here, you have to get creative. This includes with recipes, recreation, decorating, daily life, you name it. You always feel a sense of
accomplishment when you've cooked something that you had to substitute 5 items in. And when you have less options, it's easier to feel contentment.

6. Easily accessible health care!
Can you imagine a world where you walk into a modern hospital, with no appointment, stroll to the receptionist and pay (with no insurance card) $12 to see a doctor, wait for 5 minutes, and the well-educated doctor calls you into his/her office? Then if you need any medicine, you go to your local pharmacist, spend pennies on your meds without even needing a prescription? And if you have any later questions, you just call your doctor up on their mobile phone? This is the exact nature of medical care in the Capital. I'm sooooo gonna miss this.


5. The
wallahs! Remember my mom blogged about the wallahs - the men and women who provide services or sell things for a very small price. The press wallah who irons your clothes, the fruit wallah who walks by your house and sells you fresh fruit, etc. What is husband going to do without his press wallah? His wife sure doesn't iron like that!

4. The hospitality!
South Asians are notoriously hospitable. I couldn't even begin to tell you the number of times a woman and I have exchanged just a few words of small talk and she invites me into her home. They take pride in treating their guests like royalty - offering chai, sweets, food, and comfort. You always feel like you have made their week by visiting their home.


3. Bollywood!
I love getting into a taxi or auto rickshaw and the driver turns on the radio to popular Bollywood music. Or sitting in a coffee shop that plays Bollywood music videos, or going to the gym and watch Bollywood movies while working out. Bollywood is so unique and so fun, and I'm going to miss how
everywhere it is here!

2. Interesting life! It's hard to find a title to sum up the interesting day-to-day things you see here in the Capital. Opening your front door and seeing cows sitting at your gate is always fun. Or when they walk by mooing. That's cool too. Or driving down the road and you see an elephant plodding along beside you, or camels. The park we walk in has wild peacocks that cross our path. I like to chuckle at signs that are so funny (usually unintentionally), and the crazy way people drive or sell. Like the balloon wallah who rides his bike on busy streets, loaded down with dozens of balloons. And I'll definitely miss seeing all sorts of history on a daily basis. An old fort built centuries ago, or a bridge, or a tomb. It's fascinating.

1. The bargains!
This is a no-brainer. The markets are a fun experience in themselves, what with the sights, sounds, and smells. (not all bad, mind you :) But then getting a great deal on something like jewelry, clothes, shoes, or home decorations...man! I am definitely going to miss the bargains.

4.5.08

you are what you wear (kind of)

Although it may not seem like it at first arrival into this foreign land, the women in South Asia have a lot of variety in the way they dress. And I don't just mean the colors. My friend, Chrissy, asked on the other blog if it's hard to wear a sari, and I thought it might make an interesting blog to some of you.


















The picture above has several styles of clothing represented. On the right half of the picture, you see two women wearing salwar kameez suits. A
salwar kameez consists of three pieces - a long shirt (kurta), a pair of baggy pleated pants with tapered ankles (salwar) and the scarf piece (dupatta). The salwar pants are usually one size fits all at the waist because they are drawstring. But you usually have to take them to the tailor anyway to get the length you want, and sometimes get them taken in a little. They are very comfy. Usually, the dupatta and the salwars match each other, with a coordinating kurta to complete the look.

The dupatta, by the way, should almost always be worn with a suit if you want to stay modest. That's because it represents the woman's virtue, and you stand out pretty big time if you don't have on a dupatta with your suit. You don't play with your dupatta, men should never touch it, and it shouldn't drag on the ground. Unfortunately, they are very annoying, because they slip off easily and also are pretty hot. Husband calls them stupattas. I would agree.

The woman in pink is wearing a suit also, but instead of salwar pants, she has on tight legged pants called
churidars. Her kurta is also longer than what you normally see in the Capital and other cities in the north. I'm not sure if she chose this for stylistic reasons, or because she is from a different state.

The woman in green is of course wearing a
sari (or saree). I posted about it before that there are several ways to tie sarees based on the region you are living in or the design of the saree. This woman looks to have hers tied in the traditional way. Saris are very difficult to tie and wear, but they are definitely fun and flatter most figures. Since they are 6-9 meters of fabric, they are obviously heavy. Not only that, but South Asian women can spot a cheap sari a kilometer away, and I've been told that we foreign women look odd when we walk in saris. That is probably true, because they can be very awkward! Underneath a sari is what is called a petticoat, which is basically a straight long drawstring skirt. It has to be drawstring and it has to be tied tightly. (not good if you have flab you'd rather camouflage!) Also, a short top ("blouse") that is tailor made is worn under the sari as well. Let me see if I can sum up the traditional tying process into one sentence: you wrap the sari around once, tucking it into your petticoat along the way, then take it and fold in 10-15 or so pleats, tuck that big piece under your naval and attach with a safety pin, then wrap the sari around one more time, this time under the right armpit, across the chest, and then over the left shoulder. Whew. Keep in mind, the pleats have to be just so, as well as the length of the sari. Stylish sarees are worn long, and cause lots of tripping. Add in heels, heavy fabrics with heavier embroidery, and sucking in your tummy the whole time, and there you have why South Asian women think we walk strangely when wearing sarees.

Some women wear burqas, like in the picture to the right. (notice there is also a woman in green, wearing what you now know is a salwar kameez) Because the culture is very modest, most women will do their exercises in salwar kameez suits. The men will be out jogging in shorts (which they never wear any other time) but the women are still out power walking with their suits, dupattas, and tennis shoes. I even saw women in suits at the gym that I went to last year! However, clothing tends to be more modern in big cities, especially with the younger generations and in the "posher" areas of town.
And then for fancy occasions, women will sometimes wear a long skirt with a top and a dupatta, altogether called a lehenga. The traditional bride will wear a lehenga. If the woman wears a short top with spaghetti straps, that is a choli, and I've only seen this in Bollywood. I'm sure the super modern women wear them as well, though.

Something interesting is that women will even swim in their suits or sarees. Or wear swimming costumes. (Andrea will probably be blogging about that soon!) A 50-something Auntie I know went parasailing in a beach city down south a few years ago. I have never seen her in anything besides a sari, so I asked if she wore a sari while parasailing. She laughed and said something like, "Oh goodness no. Obviously, I wore a suit." She thought the question was ridiculous - of course she wouldn't wear 6 meters of fabric and a petticoat ; for water sports, it is far more practical to wear baggy pants, a knee-length shirt, and a scarf. (said with a facetious tone, of course :)

When I first moved here, I couldn't tell the difference between village-y fashion, upper class fashion, fancy or every day suits. My friend Priya even once told me that my fashion sense was pretty bad. (said in what she thought was a very helpful way!) Now I can usually recognize cheap from expensive, or North from South, but not always. There is just so much variety to the clothing here that I don't know if I would ever understand it all!

26.4.08

i have changed

I'm an American living in South Asia. When I moved here almost 3 years ago, I thought everything, and I mean everything, was weird and different, and quite frankly, backwards. I bet quite a few people can attest to the fact that I was no fun to be around that first month in country. (I hope no one feels at liberty to attest to an even longer period of time...)

Now, it's safe to say I've changed. South Asia has changed me. So in my reflective mood, I'm writing up things about me that are different, and those of you who will be seeing me on the other side of the world in a few weeks, consider yourselves warned. :)

I don't like cold weather anymore. And by cold, I mean anything under about 75 degrees. Somehow, I grew accustomed to always being warm, and now I get cold way too easily. My family can remember how husband and I shivered last May in Paris in what can only be described by normal people as beautiful sunny weather. I think I called it "icy."

When I watch American TV shows now, I always grimace when I see someone wearing shoes inside a house. It's the custom here to take off your shoes when entering any home, and sometimes even shops. Actually, it's usually pretty rude to leave them on. It makes sense - look at what we walk on daily...would you want that in your home, on your rug, or carpet? The thought of wearing my shoes inside someone's home now just seems odd and slightly disturbing.

Interaction with men will take some getting used to. Before I moved here, I would smile at strangers when I passed them, even if they were men. It was just being friendly. If I were to that here, it would be the equivalent of hitting on the guy. In fact, I rarely look men in the eye at all unless I know them. I catch myself feeling awkward around men a lot, and this will take some adjustment to fix.

I don't want meat at every meal anymore. When we went to Nepal in January, we went to a steakhouse and both of us ordered a 6 oz. steak. Neither of us could finish it! It was just too much meat. That's not to say I don't want meat, I just can't take a lot of it at one time.

Husband and I spend a lot of time together now. At first, it was odd being around my husband for more than a few hours a day. Now when we move back, we've talked about how it's going to be hard to not be together all day.

I am more conscious of my water use. I've seen how water is precious and not always a guarantee, and it concerns me. So I do try my best to conserve water.

I know there are more that I'll think of from time to time. This is not to say my changes are good or bad, I'm just different now. It has been almost 3 years, after all.

24.4.08

a heat wave is coming

We caved and turned on our AC last night. Yesterday it was 105, and next week a warm front is predicted, high of 113. In April. Yikes.

23.4.08

top 10 mundane things i'm looking forward to

We should be stepping foot on American soil in one month. This list probably changes daily, but I'm doing a Top 10 of the things I'm most looking forward to. Now obviously, I'm mostly just excited to be around my family and friends again. So, that's not on the list. Neither are travel-related things (like going to the lake) or food related things (like eating steak and baked potatoes at husband's family's house) just because those aren't exactly mundane, and also because they are pretty much a list of their own. Wow, only I could take something so simple and over-analyze it until it's complicated and categorized. So here is my list of mundane, I-always-took-this-for-granted type stuff that I'm extremely excited about:

10. A dishwasher
9. Not standing out
8. Cooking with meat
7. No 120 degree weather
6. Being fluent in the language
5. Year round variety of fruits and veggies
4. Wearing skirts and shorts
3. Comfortable furniture
*2.5. Safe tap water
2. Constant electricity
1. Mailboxes

*How could I forget that one?!

16.4.08

old city shopping

Andrea and I went to the old part of the city yesterday. It was lots of fun! We didn't just stay on the main road either, but went into "the bowels". The old city is FASCINATING! I love going there...without baby, of course. It's way too chaotic for me to walk and protect baby from all sorts of vehicles. Not to mention it was 102 yesterday, and wearing baby also means I wear sweat.

I wanted to go because I need a new sari and the old city is where they are super cheap. Andrea found the sari bazaar in a little map book since we are both extremely directionally challenged. Extremely. I can't emphasize that point enough. I'm going to do a blog tour of our day. To get the full effect, you'd need to go sit in the middle of your busiest street with a hair dryer blowing in your face.

First, we were dropped off on the main road and then hopped on a cycle rickshaw (not pictured). He seemed to know where the sari bazaar was.


He didn't, but we got a cool tour of all the small roads and alleys.


Finally he found the sari bazaar, which was pretty much where he picked us up. This is a more main road of the market.


We walked into a connecting alleyway. Even as narrow as this path was, there were still scooters, carts, and cycles going both directions, not to mention people. And probably cows too.


I have never shopped for a sari before, so I started out pretty intimidated by the rows and rows of shops. If you've ever shopped in South Asia, you know how much variety there is, and how easy it is to succumb to indecision. Andrea finally encouraged me to just pick a shop and go for it. This was the first shop. We took off our shoes, sat down, and told this man what color sari I was looking for. Then he would pull out a sari and toss it at me. I'm a horrible photographer, but somehow caught the toss in action in this picture. (sidenote: most of these pictures are Andrea's, that's why they are so good!)


He didn't have what I was looking for, so we went to several more. One shop let me "try on" a couple saris over my clothes. I was looking for a double shaded sari with black and gold. I already have black and gold jewelry, so I needed one to match that. Like I said about the colors here, it was pretty difficult to find a sari with black in it. Lime green swirls, hot pink dots, bright orange silks, and turquoise beading, however, were all at my fingertips.


This is the sari I ended up buying. This man's shop was so small we could barely sit down, let alone try on the sari. So he offered to try it on for me! I told him he was looking very beautiful. He didn't laugh though.


Here are a few more pics of the old part of the city. Make sure to notice the ear cleaner!





15.4.08

summer is here...well maybe not officially

We were talking with my parents on webcam yesterday, and my dad laughed at something I said: "It's getting hot here. Last week we broke 100 degrees. I think we'll be turning our AC on soon." He said, "It broke 100 degrees and you still haven't turned on your AC?!" I know it sounds crazy, but so far, we haven't gotten hot enough to turn it on. I think some of the reasons are that our flat is nice and cool. The houses here are designed to keep relatively cool during the (early) dry hot season. The ceiling fans are impressive! I always cringe when designers on home improvement shows look at a room and say, "Okay the ceiling fan is the first thing to go." Fans can go a long way (well...to a point) for cooling the room, and thus conserving energy used on air conditioners.

Also, dry heat is a lot different than humid heat. (That's not to say that 115 degrees in dry season isn't hot - because it is!) And finally, I think you get used to the heat. It is rare to find central air conditioning here, even in shops or malls. So unless you stand directly under the wall unit AC, the room is still pretty warm. Not to mention that auto rickshaws don't have air conditioners, and car AC's don't really help out so much in 115 degree weather anyway. And then add in the near daily power outages where you go about an hour without electricity, the heat just becomes a way of life.

Last week, we went on one of our evening walks. The weather was probably around 90 degrees, if I had to guess. (it could have been warmer - like I said, you get used to it, so I am not a good gauge at all!) We had baby in just a onesie, and we saw our neighbor walking. He stopped us and told us we should put socks on her so her feet wouldn't get cold! And as I type, I just returned from taking a mid-day grocery shopping trip with baby; it's 99 degrees outside. A man stopped me and said, "Madame, you need to cover the baby's head so she won't be cold." So although it sure feels like summer outside, I guess it's still not considered hot yet to many of fellow capital city dwellers.

5.4.08

tagged by alicia!

4 Jobs I have had in my life:
  1. Hostess at Steak and Ale
  2. Library Assistant for school district
  3. Accounting Assistant at an IT company
  4. Budget Analyst at Nasa

4 Movies I have watched more than once:

  1. You've Got Mail
  2. Kabhie Khushi Kabhi Gham
  3. Die Another Day (and pretty much all the James Bond movies)
  4. Fever Pitch

4 Places I have lived:

  1. Land of the Lumberjacks! Axe 'em!
  2. H-town
  3. South Asia
  4. um...does 2 months in Paris count? I don't have another place...

4 TV shows I watch/watched

  1. Friends
  2. Law and Order (all of them)
  3. The Office
  4. Naach Baliye 3!

4 Places I have been

  1. The Himalayas
  2. The Mae Kong River in Thailand, Laos, and Myanmar
  3. the Persian Gulf
  4. on safari in Tanzania

4 people who email me regularly

  1. Sarah
  2. the fam
  3. Christi
  4. my mom

4 of my favorite foods

  1. Veg fajitas
  2. Crab cakes
  3. Baigan ka Bharta
  4. Cheese lehsooni parantha

4 places I would like to visit

  1. NYC
  2. The East coast during fall foliage
  3. Greece
  4. Turkey

4 things I am looking forward to this year

  1. Husband getting a job
  2. Boogeying back to Texas
  3. Hugging and cuddling my nephew and nieces
  4. Going to Virginia
I have no clue who even reads this anymore, but I tag: Sarah, Deanna, Melanie, AQ, and Alison

30.3.08

one of my favorite things

The city we live in is one of the greenest capitals in the world. Seriously! There are really nice parks all over the city. Our colony (neighborhood) has about 3 nice parks in it, and then there is a really big park about half a mile from our home. Ever since we realized how much baby loves going on walks, we've been going out there several times a week.

I think I may miss these parks the most. And I'm pretty sure I'll be saying that about a lot of things.

People love to come up to baby and pinch her cheeks. And they always ask, "How old is he?" (And no, Mom, it's not because I don't always remember to put bows on her head; they even ask when she's wearing them. :)

South Asians seem to spend a lot of time enjoying the outdoors, which can seem odd, since it gets stinking hot. I wonder if it goes back to the days before air conditioners, when even though it gets 115 degrees outside, it's worth it to sit in the park and wait for a wayward breeze. Or maybe it's the community these people share with each other, where even a city of 17 million can still feel like a village in many ways. Jaya and her mother have walked in one of our colony parks every evening for at least a decade. Jaya and her mother both look at least 10 years younger than they really are - is it good genes or the physical activity?

The park our family has been walking in lately has really nice paths to jog or stroll along. Some kids ride bikes on them, which as long as they are careful, isn't too bad. Now, the other day, some impatient man decided to skip the crazy traffic on the roads and instead rode his scooter through the park. I wasn't too happy about that. But luckily that's the only time that has happened.

There are signs throughout the park that make me laugh. I guess the designers had the idea to create exercise stations. So there is a place for everything from push ups to neck exercises. We haven't quite figured out what the number of meters means (if that's what the M even stands for). Any guesses?


Getting a work out. Sorry for our camera's poor quality! I wish I had gotten the little boy yesterday whose mother made him do the "uneven walk". I don't even know what that exercises, but he was whining , "Why must we exercise, mummy?" It was pretty cute. I think I'd question that one, as well!

15.3.08

president's gardens

Today we went to the equivalent of the White House here in the capital. There are some really pretty gardens at the President's house that are only open to the public in February and March, so we went today. I tried to find something interesting about the gardens online, but I couldn't. It does have 250 different types of roses (including the Okla Homa Rose...not Oklahoma, mind you). It was designed in the mughal and English garden design by a Britisher, and from my quick 2 minute research, I think that was in 1929. But that's all I know. :)

I do know it's really pretty though! The circular garden was the prettiest. Husband remarked that it is a glimpse of perfection, and that we can't even imagine how beautiful the place prepared for us will be.

They don't allow cameras in, so I had to settle for googled images. It looks basically exactly like this, except with swarms of people. When we walked up to the entrance, there were two separate metal detector and security lines for us to go through - ladies and 'gents'. This is very common, since the culture is so modest. It would be inappropriate for a man to lightly frisk a woman. Side note: with all our recent airport trips, we've carried baby in her sling through the security checks. Each time I've gone through, the women have told me to leave my bag on the conveyor belt, to which I've shown a peek of baby. Every single time, the woman has exclaimed, "OH! So sweet!" and has nudged all her coworkers to look at the baby, and they've all exclaimed as well. It's pretty fun to surprise them.

I had baby and her bag, and a man on a microphone and loudspeaker called out to me, "Madam, you must leave your bag!" We walked over to him to show him it was just baby's bottle and diapers. We were right next to him, but he continued to address us, eye to eye, on the microphone. "You can take the baby bottle and nappies, but you must leave the bag." We thought that was pretty funny.

I think baby was more of a spectacle than the flowers, and I'm not just saying that because I'm her mother. South Asians love babies, especially blue eyed light-skinned ones. It was like every where we went, we could hear such remarks as, "Look at the baby!" "Oh it's a baby!" "She looks like a doll!" etc. It's fun to have a celebrity baby. :)

In the gardens, there were some flowers that we have in our front "yard". So I thought I'd post them so it would be semi-authentic pictures from today's family outing.

11.3.08

please note

I added a link to all my blogging friends on the right. If you'd rather not be linked to me, out of security, anonymity, or embarrassment :), just comment. I'll delete the link and your comment. :)

10.3.08

different parenting philosophies

Even within a similar culture, there are countless opinions on raising children. So it should have come to no surprise to me that a culture half a world away would have different ideas from my own on how a baby should be treated.

The main thing I've noticed deals with crying. Most of the South Asians I've talked with won't let their child cry. If a child cries, he must be picked up or fed immediately. Last week, I went to visit D*, a lady I met in our prenatal classes. Her baby boy was born 5 weeks after our girl. She says he wakes up every 2 hours all night long, and she has to pick him up and walk him around the house until he falls back asleep. Curious, I asked her if she ever let him 'cry it out.' She looked almost horrified and said no. She told me that even when she goes to the bathroom, she tells her house helper to come get her if he starts to cry! It's no wonder she told me she's considering not having any more kids. I think I'd go insane if I couldn't even go to the bathroom. Later on at D's, baby girl needed her diaper changed. As I changed it, she fussed. D and her husband came rushing to see what was wrong with baby girl and asked repeatedly what I was going to do to stop her crying! It made me very nervous.

Even more drastic, we heard a slightly disturbing story about some friends of ours who are raising a child in the mountain town we used to live in. Their baby was crying in the middle of the night, and it seems the parents had decided to let her cry it out. Apparently, the neighboring family didn't approve of this method, for they showed up at their door, asking why the baby was crying. If I heard the story correctly, it was the whole family who came a-knockin'!

The traditional South Asian family lives in a multiple family home, with several generations under one roof. D and her husband live on their own, and I think part of the consequences with that is she feels pretty clueless about raising her baby. I don't mean to imply that she's a bad mother or that I have it all together, because neither is true. D just peppered me with questions about baby development, from when they start solids to poopy diapers to sitting up. She even asked me if my 3 month old baby was saying "mommy" yet. I hated to disappoint her hopes that her baby boy would be telling her what he wanted in a few weeks. My guess is that elders help out tremendously with South Asian mothers, and poor D doesn't have anyone to consult.

Some other funny questions we've been asked by adults:

People are very curious about the baby sling. I can't tell you how many have seen her snuggled up, sound asleep, and asked, "Is she comfortable like that?" They seem to think babies should be flat and straight at all times, forgetting that for 9 months, the baby curled up comfortably in tight quarters.

When we took her to the office at 6 weeks old, a grown man asked in all seriousness, "Are her eyes opening yet?" As in like puppies.

"Where is her hair?" Many, many people find it very odd that she doesn't have a full head of hair.

"Does she speak Hindi?" I guess only time will tell. :)

7.3.08

what's so great about thailand?


In the last 2.5 years, we've been to Thailand 5 times, usually to the same city up in the hills. You would think it would get old, but it never does! We look forward to it every time, and I'm a little sad our last trip to Thailand is over for this term.

To me, it's like America but with Asian prices and services. Granted, my view of "nice" is a little skewed now. But I think anyone would find it nice! So just what is it that is so great about Thailand?

The markets! You can find house decorations, like table runners and lamps. Also clothes, shoes, jewelry, food, and so much more, all for super cheap prices if you bargain correctly.


The markets also have places to get foot rubs! I think that's my favorite part. You can sit, and watch the action, while paying $2 to get a 30 minute foot rub. We found a place on our last trip that did an hour foot, shoulder, and neck massage for $5. You can't beat that!


Fun foods, like banana roti! And also the fruits I posted about last summer, and other great places to eat.


The Thais seem to enjoy beauty, specifically in making the city aesthetically pleasing. There are flowers and plants all over the city, and there is even a blossom tree-lined moat through part of it. The weather is beautiful, too.


The beach! To be honest, we've only been to one of their beaches, and it's not their nicest or most family-friendly. But it's still a beach, and they bring around fried shrimp, chicken, ice cream, and funny enough, corn on the cob for you to eat while lounging. And even some ladies come by offering foot rubs!


16.2.08

marriage retreat

Sometimes we get to do the coolest, most edifying things! This week was no exception. Some wonderful leaders of ours hosted a marriage retreat for the 4 here on a certain team, which includes us, so we got to join in on the fun. It was a stretch for me, being away from baby for 36 hours, but it was well worth it.

It was very laid back. We got together in a large group and discussed certain topics. The two couples leading us have over 60 years of marriage combined between the two of them, so they of course had lots of great advice to offer. Then in the afternoons, the husbands and wives split up to discuss gender-specific issues. But in between all this was lots of food and lots of dating! The leaders provided 3 huge breakfasts for us (complete with bacon and sausage!) and at lunch the couples went out on dates. So it was a great way for husband and I to explore new places in the capital.

The first day, I got to choose the date, and I chose a restaurant/lounge I'd been eyeing for awhile. It's in a market near us, so if we can save up again, we'll go back! It was really nice and romantic - dark purple velvet couches, deep red pillows and walls, low lighting. I felt very sophisticated. :)


That evening, the leaders gave us an extraordinary candlelit dinner that I still don't know how they pulled off with the tiny ovens we have here.

The next day, husband picked the date. We went to a really nice outdoor garden restaurant we like, where we sat in a little tented area.
After lunch, we took a walk through some really nice gardens.

On our way back we got a special treat of seeing an elephant and two camels among our traffic. What a cool city!

The discussions were very encouraging for all of us, and made for one of my favorite Valentine's Days ever! We owe a ton of gratitude to those back home who helped fund this refreshing time, and to the boss for creating marriage - what a wonderful gift He gave us!

29.1.08

2007 in pictures

My friend Kelley had a great idea of looking back on 2007 with her favorite photos. I decided to steal her idea. :) I've narrowed them down to my Top 10 favorite pictures of 2007, 5 anonymous for this blog, and the other 5 on the family blog.


5. This picture was taken in a J temple. It's in my top 5 because it sums up perfectly why we are here in South Asia.


4. This was taken on a beach in Thailand, and I like it because it makes me laugh. It seems auto rickshaws really are every where. :)


3. Jaya lighting candles around her home for the festival of lights. I love all the colors in this photo. It's hard for me to believe I only met her last year. She was definitely my most meaningful friendship in 2007.


2. It was hard to choose my favorite picture from Venice, because the city is picturesque from all angles. This is from the Grand Canal. Our European trip was our big vacation of 2007 (and probably our life!) so of course Venice had to have a special mention.


1. Paris is possibly my favorite city on the planet, so not only did it deserve to be on this list, it deserved the top slot. It was even harder to narrow down my favorite Parisian shot. I realized I can't go wrong with a classic, so I decided on this one, taken beautifully by my husband.